a hearts twisted pain

[Kyokki Tenkiame]

"It's nothing" Kyokki ALMOST told her, as she quickly wiped the tears from her face, not wanting to be seen. But then, Akiko-san needed to know, just the same as she did, ne?

"He kissed me," she told Akiko softly. She doubted Naito-kun could hear... doubted Naito could hear.

"In the rain. On the hokage mountain. I didn't know."

[Santomoro Purotekuta- Mei]

Naito was tackled and said "I thought I saw somthing ok"he was tackled onto a journal and it was pressed up against his chest he coughed and bits of blood came but he wiped them off and said to himself'I guess I should tell them huh?'he got up and handed her the journal his body slightly shaking and said "i am sorry"

[Kyokki Tenkiame]

Kyokki took it from him, but despite being normally polite, she didn't say thank you. She didn't say anything.

"He doesn't own me anything," she realized. She couldn't see the way her eyes grew blank as she drew back into herself.

"Don't think about it, don't think about it." she told herself mentally, rocking back and forth from her heels to her toes, and singing along inside of her head with the first song that came to mind.

Silhouettes above the cradle, pull me down/they won't let me go the wrong way...

[Inukami]

"What?!?".she looked at kyokki then at Naito then back at kyokki in disbelief
"i know you didn't just say what i think you just said".she said her mouth opened wide not believing this
"sorry? you think sorry is gonna cut it?".she yelled punching him straight in the face she wasnt angry at kyokki because she knew Naito had done wrong not here
"This clearifies what i thought of boys before..good for notthin cheaters".she screamed angrly

[Santomoro Purotekuta- Mei]

as he was hit he coughed more blood this time into his hands this time it was getting more severe he reached into his pocket to get the pills his blood covered hands now placed the blood on the bottle he desprately tried to open it but his blood covered hands wouldnt alow him to he had been born with a hole in his heart and when he felt alot of pain and sorrow it started to make him cough blood and if he didnt stop he would die

[Kyokki Tenkiame]

"Stop for a minute, Akiko-san..."

Her voice was shaking as she took the bloody bottle from his hand and opened it, pressing two of the pills into his hand. It was her best guess at the dosage. In her experience, once you turned thirteen the doctors always gave you two.

She was so horribly angry at him in this moment, but this wasn't just a fight now. Kyokki had a feeling that it was his life. And while he owed her nothing, she owed him and his siblings everything- her life, her saftey, her secrecy, plus all of bachan's as well.


Besides, she was a kunoichi, and she had to look out for another village member- no matter how much she felt like she hated him right now.

[Inukami]

Akiko shook in fury
"stupid..worthless..pig!".she yelled at Naito angryly,but when she saw how desperte he was to take his meds she backed away her pretty face still flushed red
"What's wrong with him?".she asked kyokki still frowning in displeasure
She hated him so much right..but she didnt want him dead
*tell me if i'm under da limit k*

[Kyokki Tenkiame]

(missed it by three words, Inu)

Kyokki looked at Akiko-san, her eyes worried and confused. She could pulverize Naito later- or let Amane-bachan or Sen do it- but she prayed he'd be alive when she did it.

The memory of the conversation she and Naito had had just before walking into the tea shop. who knnew a promise would be that hard to keep?

"Your heart?" she asked him.

[Santomoro Purotekuta- Mei]

Naito took the medicine and let out a heavy sigh and said "I was born with a hole in my heart but I dont tell people since then they would take it easy on me"He took out a bottle of water and a hankechif and dampend it he cleaned off the blood and said"if I have to much strain on my body I will begin coughing up my blood"

[Kyokki Tenkiame]

Kyokki was frightened; she couldn't deny that. But as soon as she saw Naito was alright, most of her concern had faded. Naito had asked her in advance to forgive him if he ever hurt her. And shehad said she would keep it in mind, which was nearly the same thing as promising. But this...

She turned around and turned her back on the scene and retreated back into herself.

It was an involuntary action, almost reflexive for her. Imagine placing your hand on a hot cook top. Your brain automatically sends a signal so that you jerk back. It’s an act of self-preservation, so that you don’t get burned anymore than you already have. Kyokki’s withdrawal was much the same thing.

If she tried, Kyokki could envision it in her mind’s eye- how her being just kind of crumpled and curled into a ball inside of the papery shell that was her body.

Withdrawing was something that Kyokki had taught herself to do early on, from a very young age. It hadn’t taken her long to figure out she got hurt less that way. People summed it up to ‘distancing herself ’ and some called it unhealthy. But she had found that when you found you had no other form of recourse left, it was often the sanest, safest option.


Whenever she retreated to deep inside of herself, Kyokki refused to face whatever it was that was hurting her, to confront her problems. Instead, she filled her brain with snatches of memorized verse, something that she could focus on with out a whole lot of thought involved, something to fill and fortify her mind, leaving no room for anything else.

It didn’t change the situation in the end. She was still angry, and the tears were still streaming down her face, and leaving streaks behind.. Sheltering herself just served as an anesthetic, numbing her wounds and bruises until she could get out of the danger zone.

(sorry if I got carried away there... stayed home sick w/ a fever to day and wrote that out on notebook paper when not sleeping because I was bored)

[Inukami]

*i'm sry 4 makin u guyz wait*

[Kyokki Tenkiame]

*it's ok. Ur turn next, though.*

[Inukami]

"no..no this is not happening to me again..it can't happen..Ahh..why..why am i not good enough for you Naito..how could you hurt me like this?..how could you hurt her like that?".she asked finally letting out a tiny sob as tears rolled down her face quickly drinping down
"you don't understand..how much i liked you..".she admited

[Santomoro Purotekuta- Mei]

He looked at them and bowed his face his hair hiding him and said "I feel for booth of you because you were booth nice....very few people were ever kind t me so it is like a curse I fall for those who are nice and I cant control it"tear came down his cheek and said "you have no idea but I am actually in love with booth of you"he cough and more blood came up

[Kyokki Tenkiame]

"No matter how painful the time/ Why is it that I sing? (Who knows)/ I don’t want to love anymore/ Why am I growing distant? (darling darling ah)/ I can’t hear anything/ The desert dawn is cast on my eyelids/ My tears don’t spill at all /I just tried turning BLUE .../I can’t feel anything anymore! It’s that age, isn’t it/ The sadness of the clown, the spinning lights...."


Kyokki kept going, trying her hardest to drown out reality. She heard him coughing and talking behind her. Finaly, though, she let her shiled down just long enough to comment.

"We're two people Naito. Not one. And you're not the only one in pain."

It was obvious, a no-brainer, really, but he seemed to need reminding. She turned to him and offered him a hand up, but she would meet his gaze. Her body with was shaking with the nedd to hit him, to run, to do something. There had always been things she'd thought she'd do in this situation, but she'd never imagined her sense would be in such an over load.

Kyokki wiped away tears from her own face with one hand. She heard herself talking, and hardly realized the words she was saying.

"You need to go home so Aishiteru can patch you up. You'll die if you keep up this act."